There are many forms of abuse in relationships. Here are some more things to help a person know if they are involved with someone that is abusive. Remember abuse isn’t always done in the form of hitting although you may be threatened.
http://www.lilaclane.com/relationships/emotional-abuse/
A person may threaten to harm you financially if they let you know they want to take things from you.
A person may threaten to harm you if they say they are going to lie to the police declaring you have harmed them when you haven’t done so. I recently read that abusers have started to try to manipulate the system by threatening to tell lies about their partner before or if their partner tells the truth about them.
In most cases you have no choice but to get away from this abusive person. Get away from them because they have proven to you that they cannot be trusted to do or say the right things. If someone can threaten to tell lies about you & they have threatened to harm you in any way doesn’t that tell you they are not a loving person?
God does not want you to be unequally yoked. If you are a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ and you ended up married to someone that abuses you know that you can leave that destructive person. You can leave & you most probably should leave before they get to manipulate you more than they have already.
Don’t blame yourself for their ugly behavior. Don’t take the blame that isn’t yours to take. Be honest (knowing you can’t lie to God or to yourself) and recognize that you were conned. Recognize it for what it is and get away from the abuser.
Remember the vows taken before God were vows that both people made. Your con artist abusive partner failed to remember the vows taken. You would remain faithful but your spouse did not remain faithful. Faithfulness to treat a spouse with love & respect is part of a healthy relationship. When your partner abuses you they are not faithful to God. When they threaten to harm you they are not faithful to you.
Nowadays many Godly Pastors and counselors are aware of how bad these type of people are. People that have been battered have started to open up telling these counselors what they have been going through.
Do not stay in an abusive situation. Get out. Stay out. Do not talk with the abuser any more than you have to.
Pray for ways to be set free from those type of people. Ask God fearing people to pray for you. When the opportunity arrives for you to go GO!
Flee like a bird being let out of it’s cage. Run like a gazelle.
I read that statistically it takes a victim about 7 times of returning to their partner before they finally leave for good. Do the best you can to keep from being victimized as long as that! Pray that you can have the strength to leave knowing that you will be healthier and happier without living with the one who abuses and uses you.
Don’t make excuses for your abuser. Don’t remember the good times with them because those times were all lies, too! They used every ounce of decency they could imagine to pretend to be someone they are not. Recall they do know how to treat you the right way but they didn’t continue to do it! They worked hard to learn about you before they got you in their lair. They are like a nasty animal that seeks prey to devour.
People like that are not good people. Find groups designed to help you recognize abusers tactics and remember what you’ve read.
Do not trust your abuser again. This person has not earned your trust. Let your memory cause you to remember that there are people that cannot be trusted. The person that abused you is not to be trusted. You are better off without the abuser in your life.
One of the first things an abuser does if you try to get away from them is they will start to act nicer. They will do all they can to try to get you to recall the good times you once shared. This is part of the cycle of abuse. They want to pull you back into the trap. It is best to remember exactly how ugly they acted. Do recall the abusive things they said and did. This is no time to forgive and forget! Forgive YES Take Abuse NO!
Do not get confused just because you know God wants you to forgive 70 X 7. God does want you to forgive. God does not want you to remain a victim being abused by a nasty spirited person that thrives on harming other souls.
The ones that pretend to love God are the worst of all enemies. They are like King Saul throwing that weapon full force towards David. They are tormented by whatever evil plagues them. They bounce back and forth seeking someone else to torment. They are moved by jealousy, selfishness, greed, and they definitley have a power struggle. They are not able to completely control themselves at all times. They get very frustrated when they are no longer able to control you! They will do almost anything to keep their victims deluded by them.
They do not love only one person fully. They speak a lot of empty words. Their words do not have life because they do not fulfill their good promises. The person they love the most is themself! They don’t know the power of true Godly love. If they knew about God’s love they would show it.
I am all for marriage and miracles. It may be hard to tell it in this particular writing. It’s just imperative for people to know that God did not intend for His children to be manipulated and conned by abusive liars. These abusive liars are following the devil. People that follow God do not hurt other people with abuse.
Love is not abuse! Abuse is not love! Learn to recognize abuse so you won’t be a party to it. Learn to recognize abuse so you can get away from it. When God opens the door run and don’t look back.
Think of Lot’s wife and how she looked back. She turned into a pillar of salt because she looked back. What was she looking back at? The place she left was being destroyed because the people were evil in that place. Run away from evil.
Those who love the Lord hate evil.